The Palmloader
Writing May 6th, 2006Putting the finishing touches on a chapter where one of the main characters learns how to use a “palmloader.” I’m a little leary of adding a substitute for guns in a fantasy novel. I’ve heard that so-called “western fantasies” don’t do all that well because fantasy readers want swords, not guns. If they wanted guns, they’d be reading crime novels.
I hope I’ve been able to hit a nice balance between using projectile weapons–not necessarily a gun–and also appeasing the sword-fanatics by creating the palmloaders, which are so wildly inaccurate that a soldier better be less than twenty feet from a target and also carry a sword as well in case he misses. This somewhat reminds me of the rifles from the Thirty-Years War in Europe. Some of these rifles were so large and unweildy that they were most often carried by two soldiers and had a pole beneath it for stabilizing it when it was time to aim. Another interesting thing about these rifles was that they were just as likely to blow up those using it as it was to shoot in the intended direction.
Not a job I’d want, being assingned to test out prototype guns in the 17th century. I’ve tried to add a little bit of this inaccuracy and unpredictability into the palmloaders, which incidentally, are powered by magic and not gunpowder.
May 7th, 2006 at 2:35 am
I’m glad you’re putting guns in your novel. Anything that defies the generic fantasyland is always welcome. Now all you need to do is add an entity composed of self-aware hydrogen who runs a circus featuring zebra golems. They get from place-to-place by causing the tectonic plates to drift beneath them until the spot where they wish to be arrives. And don’t forget the insane flocks of tinntinnabulations that assault anyone they find traveling on holy days.
May 8th, 2006 at 11:08 am
Wow … I’m not sure if you’re referring to real fantasies I’ve never read, or about fantastic things right off the top of your head. Pretty cool thoughts.
I really have a tough time getting into standard fantasies anymore. I like reading things that are just a little bit different from the norm, and I like writing them too.
May 8th, 2006 at 11:30 am
Thought it all up just while I was writing my first response, actually. What’s my secret, you ask? Boredom. Sheer boredom. My life is boring, so my brain has to find ways to entertain itself.
I don’t really care for the generic stuff, either. It is not so much the standard quest plot that I hate, although that is wearing thin, too, but the pseudo-medieval setting with knights and elfs and dwarfs and all the creaky old standards. And I hate trilogies. I want my story in one book, thank you very much.
May 8th, 2006 at 3:53 pm
Agreed. The pseudo-medieval setting with the elfs and dwarfs has been overdone. I won’t even pick up a novel anymore if the cover has a picture of one or the other on it. (Unless it’s a very shiny cover, indeed!)
May 10th, 2006 at 12:10 am
One odd trend I’ve noticed in a lot of fantasy stories and RPGs is that dwarfs, as a race, are usually on the decline. They are either slowly dying off or at least are long past their prime. Anyone have an explanation why this is?
May 10th, 2006 at 12:18 pm
I don’t know as far as RPGs go, since I don’t play many of those. But I think that all the typical fantasy races are on the decline in mainstream fantasy. There are a few publishing houses that are several years behind the cutting edge that continue to produce books that perpetuate the typical races. And then they wonder why those books aren’t selling well . . . we discussed this last night at writing group.
My opinion is that elves, orcs, and dwarves have found a home, at least temporarily, in the MMORPGs. World of Warcraft, for example, has no shortage of dwarves.
May 10th, 2006 at 6:46 pm
Oh, so they were simply migrating. And here I thought it was because they were victims of alien abduction.
May 11th, 2006 at 10:24 am
Some people consider video game developers aliens. So yeah, maybe it is alien abduction.